NOTHING

a speck of nothing

on a land of nothingness

the worth of it, i can see no more

each day passes by - morning, noon and night

and there comes another bright morning

with another gloomy mood!!

every dawn i hope to remember

a smile, a laugh, a tear.........

I LOVE RONNIE!!

The moment he sees me, his tail wags, his ears stand high and he runs up to me wit the same gusto every single day. He drools all over my face and I feel the purest form of love in it. He shows me love the way he knows it. His unconditional love is incomparable to any human relationship I’ve ever had. I can vouch without fear that even when all is gone he’ll still love me like no one else. If you have not figured it out yet I am talking about my adorable little pooch.

GOODBYE

SAYING GOODBYE IS THE HARDEST THING- especially if it’s someone you love.

I and my boyfriend have spent the last few years being inseparable. I consider him my best friend, my soul mate and the most important person in my life. We have been the envy of all our friends. We would meet everyday with a smile and a belief that we belonged together. We would sit and chat sometimes discussing how long distance relationships never work and how could people survive that kind of relationship where all the problems would exist but the best part of being together would not. It was definitely not an option for us.

The horror broke when my boyfriend’s father announced that he wanted him back to handle the business. Deep within I knew this day was coming, as he’s not from Bangalore, but i kept denying the fact. After days and months of arguing about it and having sleepless nights, finally I asked him to go. Hoping and praying silently that he wouldn’t. Everyday we would sit and think about ways to avoid this discussion but ended up crying in each other’s arms. The decision was made, he would go settle the business and come back within a year.

Finally “the day” we dreaded arrived. He had his entire luggage packed, his vehicle sent back home and train ticket in his pocket. We spent the whole day hand in hand, walking like just another day. We spoke of the weather, the food and traffic consciously avoiding saying goodbye. We laughed, whispered all the sweet nothings making it seem like nothing is wrong. In these few days I realised that we could actually think from both mind and heart. And what I was doing on that day was thinking from my mind. I kept telling myself I’m ok, I’m strong; everything is going to be alright.

Hesitantly we walked out of the restaurant knowing what was going to come. We had decided, I was not going to see him off to avoid all the emotional torture. So I was going to take a rickshaw home and he would go to the railway station. We stood outside on the footpath staring in the other’s eye. I dreaded this moment, I dint know what to do or how to say goodbye. This was the time my heart took over. All kinds of thoughts bombarded my mind. I stood there thinking when I would see him next and the tears dropped down without my knowledge. Somewhere inside me I was still hoping he would cancel his plans but that was not a possibility.

We held each other and cried on the street promising we would not let any obstacle hinder our love.

The hardest part about parting is saying goodbye. On that day we consoled and made the other smile but still could not say goodbye. We embraced and I sat inside the rickshaw, looking at him. The rickshaw started moving, I put my head out to get a last glimpse of him, and he stood there staring in my way waving at me with tears in his eyes.

It’s been a while since that day and I remember every bit of it. Those few days have made our bond even stronger. It has definitely made us change our opinion about long distance. If love is true and pure nothing can ever get in between it, not even the distance. Someone sitting miles away is thinking of you just the way you are, is the best gesture of love.

bubble bursts

Only few times in our life do we realise and see what is true. We tend to oversee the most obvious things; rather we choose not to see them. There are times when I have stopped and wondered if I’m happy because I see world the way I want it and have kept myself in a bubble. I fooled myself to an extent that I secretly built a fairytale and kept adding more fantasies and well seems like the prince is never going to show up after all. The bubble has broken and yet I console myself and think otherwise. There’s always a time in one’s life when she wants to hold on so tight and not let go that you almost convince the other the same. And love doesn’t need convincing. When someone asks- do you love me? When are you coming? Will you call me? Anyone would give an assenting reply unless a jerk. It’s never the other person’s fault; for the most part I’ve never listened to what he had to say. He said things what I wanted to hear and not what is true. Probably he dint know what he wanted, no one is ever sure of what they want in life and so I can never blame him for the way I feel. But I can only feel sad for myself, because end of all I’m madly in love even though I can foresee what’s in for me. The funny part being, I’m still hoping for a ‘happily ever after’......